Are we going again in the wrong direction?

 

6/4/2020

Dear Mutsumi,

I am sad because you haven’t answered me. You haven’t sent the number of Bank account. But I want to take your heavy letter in a positive way: it is possible that you are communicating to me the chance that if I pass to you some money, you will consider creating a relationship with Haruka.

We have argued and fought for 5 years. Please, don't restart another cycle.

We both know how we have reached this situation. So now don't speculate too much. Your mail was really heavy, offensive and speculative (it isn't based on reality but on your feelings and you overshot the real situation drawing an imaginary scenario).

So first of all, don't blame me. I recall you that you asked to have the point number 6 on the Settlement where is written that we have to avoid to blame each others.

Second, in Italy the System is different, the school is free. The wages are lower. I don't know how much I can pass to you every month. It seems to me that for you any effort I can do it would be nothing because it is not on Japanese standard and model. So, if you don't speak how can I know what you need? It is years that I ask to have a fair agreement with you. So, express clearly what you want and need. I want to find a solution. I am ready to pass some money. It is right. I always said it.

And this time the rights are of Haruka too, not only mine.

However, I maintain my promise on the amount of money I want to send these months, but you have also to declare how you want to proceed and when we start the internet communications with Haruka.

Because the facts are clear:
- At the moment I don't have a number of bank account from you.
- You are not fulfilling the settlement in the points number 3, number 4, number 5 and recently also number 6.

- You haven’t established a Rapid Alert System, in case that something happen to you or Haruka.

- You can claim some money, but it is completely disconnected with the fact you have to stick with the duty you have after you have signed the Settlement.

So, after all I have written, I only hope that your letter isn’t another attempt to make me feel guilty in order to postpone the chance I may have a relationship with Haruka.

However, I propose you to restart from the scratch.

If I can pass, for example, only 200 € per month this year, and sometime a lump sum. Is this valid for you? For me it is an effort at the moment but hopefully for this beginning I can afford it. Later I hope to improve my help.

Last year I had to be in Japan twice. And it wasn’t a vacation. (Even though the second  time I was much more serene). I spent a lot. Do you imagine how much of that money could have been for Haruka? In Tokyo you went in an expensive hotel. I haven't said anything. But if I save money when I am in Japan, all the rest is for Haruka and you.

You are a great person, I have grew thinking about your teachings and your advices. But your idea of me is really depressing. Every time it is like going under a train. I have to pick up the pieces of myself and try to put them together to try to go ahead.

Don't ruin everything now. We are in a good situation after all. Thanks to you I am a little better than 5 years ago. And I apologize if I speak too much about Economic Crisis, I have my limits. You don’t have to accept me, just try to tolerate me because I always considered you the best one and a really sensible person.

At this point, however, I can only give something rather than take something off. I hope you may take the chance…

Bye.

Andrea